Friday, October 19, 2012

Saying Goodbye

My grandmother passed away the day we were discharged from the hospital, 10/7/12. She was laid to rest on 10/11/12. It was the most beautiful day and the weather was perfect. She wouldn't have wanted anyone to be uncomfortable. Justin served as one of the pallbearers along with John, Grant, and my other cousins (Bryan, Travis, and Houston). After the funeral, my aunt Susan's house was full of people and good food. My grandmother would have loved all the laughter and visiting that took place in her honor. I'm not one to notice these types of details but her casket was a beautiful dark maple color with a gold shell detail. Mom said Dad picked it out because it reminded him of trips to the beach.


Every summer when I was little, we would take a trip to Myrtle Beach. Papa and Granny would sit under the umbrella. I think this is one of my favorite pictures of them because Granny has that look on her face protesting having her picture taken.

We'd also take a trip every fall to the mountains. I remember resting my head in Granny's lap because I was so carsick. I asked Granny once why she never got carsick and she said she would look out the window and follow the streams that ran along side of the roads.


Some of my dad's best childhood memories are of these mountain trips. Papa was very spontaneous and when he would hear of snow in the mountains, he'd gather the kids up, Granny would pack a block of cheese, box of saltine crackers, and gallon of milk, and they would head up there just to see it. When they had more time to prepare, Granny would make fried chicken and potato salad (a legendary Granny dish). I remember countless picnics in the mountains eating fried chicken and potato salad. On one such occassion, Granny got an itch to climb a tree. I believe she was 70 at the time. She got stuck and Dad and Kebo had to get her down. She laughed so hard she could barely help them. That was one of my favorite memories of her.


Papa passed away 10 years ago when I was 19 and at Clemson. It is very difficult to loose the first grandparent. Especially someone as young spirited as he was. Papa was 81 at the time but would have kept going to 801 if he had the choice. The last thing he said to me the weekend before he died was to get my education because that is something no one can ever take from me. He only finished the 6th grade, as I recall, because he was needed to help work cotton fields and in the mill to help bring in money to the family. He also told me I was the apple of his eye. I've always loved that expression.



Papa and Granny belonged together. I've never seen a more devoted wife in all my life. After Justin and I were married, she'd often tell me that there's nothing in the world worth fussing about. I have so say she is absolutely right. There isn't anything that loosing tempers or raising voices has ever solved. She'd also say when we'd get off the phone to take care of each other. A simple suggestion but very powerful,  and very indicative of her attitude towards marriage. Her love for her husband and children came in every meal she made, drink she refilled, and load of laundry she washed (and line dried--she had the best smelling laundry). I hope to be as committed and gracious a wife and mother as she was.



There are several things I miss about her already. The way it took about 20 minutes to wrap up a phone conversation, the way she was so excited to see me or talk to me on the phone (I was always greeted with a big "Hey Jes!") and the funny poems she would make up for us on our birthdays. I'll be 30 this year and I really would have loved to know what she would have come up with that rhymed with 30...I have a feeling the word "dirty" would have been used somewhere. I am sad that she couldn't meet Jack but I know she and Papa will be looking out for him.


I love you both very much and am so thankful to have had you in my life and to have been a part of yours. You made me feel special and very loved. I'm thankful to have been one of the older grandchildren because I have the most precious memories of you. I look forward to the day when we see one another again. I'm so glad you are together again, I know it has been a long 10 years apart. 

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